Chapter 3: Amaka No Go Use Me Shine
I remove eye from her side, begin gist with my roommates like say nothing happen.
Seyi dey crack joke, Tolu dey talk football. I just dey laugh, dey eat gala. For my last life, na silence kill me. This time, na mouth go save me.
Last life, dem still stand for my side, but I too form, I no talk my mind, na that one worsen things.
I dey always feel say if I bone, problem go disappear. But Naija, if you no talk, people go use your silence against you. Now I dey different.
Now I sabi: as man, you gats protect yourself. If you see woman wey no get shame, abeg, no dey fear, talk your mind.
My papa always say, "No let anybody use your destiny do comedy." If Amaka try am, I go give am full show.
After class for afternoon, everybody rush cafeteria, fear say food go finish.
The jollof rice no dey last, so boys dey run like marathon. Even the beans dey run belle, but nobody send. Hunger na hunger. One girl even tear wrapper for queue last week. E no easy.
Me and my roommates plan chop outside, so we dey go school gate.
Suya joint for junction na our spot. The man dey always greet us, dey gist how e go run for council chairman next year.
Who go believe say Amaka Okoye go still run come:
As we dey waka, na so she block front. "Musa, na because you know say I dey go out every afternoon, na why you follow this road?"
She dey act like say she sabi everything.
She do small catwalk, fix hair, dey twist face. Even some girls dey peep from corner, dey shake head. One guy for back shout, "Na wa o! Amaka, e never do?"
Some classmates wey dey pass see the drama.
One dey record with phone, another dey laugh dey say, "Reality show don start."
Amaka Okoye dey shine eye like say she win something, I just follow the play, elbow my roommate:
"Who send you go suggest suya outside? See as fine girl dey notice you now. You check her timetable?"
Seyi just dey run mouth, dey block his face from laugh. "No be me o! If I hear say Amaka dey do timetable for us, na spiritual matter be that."
I no even touch am well, na just play I dey play.
My roommate sharp, shout, "I beg o! Musa, no set me up. She sef get boyfriend. Why I go dey find her schedule?"
Tolu add, "Abeg, my babe go wound me! Amaka, shift go front."
Amaka Okoye, as if she no get the joke, sharply reply, "I never get boyfriend, but wetin I hate pass na guys wey dey do anyhow."
She raise chin, dey talk like say she dey audition. Boys for back dey clap slow, dey shout "Oscar winner!"
My roommate nearly vomit. "Babe, all of us get babe. Abeg, no dey follow us up and down."
Tolu add, "See, na Seyi babe dey drive him around. No follow us o."
"If our babes hear this one, dem go finish us!"
The whole road just dey rowdy. Even okada man stop, dey watch.
Everybody join mouth.
Some dey shout, some dey laugh, one girl for corner dey record everything for WhatsApp story. Na so gist dey spread for school.
I nod quick, "Huzi babe fine die. E no fit like you, so abeg, stop dey follow us."
I just run, my guys follow me.
As we dey run, I hear one girl for back say, "See boys, dem dey fear Amaka!" But I no send.
E be like say na coincidence, but everybody for our hostel dey fine. Two sef, senior girls rush dem for orientation camp, na so dem get babe.
E even dey cause wahala, because dem dey do inter-hostel visit like say na festival. My own na to avoid trouble.
But for person like Amaka Okoye, all of us get sense—run far.
Na Seyi talk say, "Guy, for this our campus, if you near wahala, you go collect. No be by fine face."
My own na to make sure everybody see her madness clear.
I dey plan my level, dey save myself.
News spread fast.
People dey screenshot, dey talk for group chat, dey add voice note. "See as Amaka dey disturb boys for gate. Who go collect her?" Some dey drop sticker, one send that 'God abeg' meme.
But as the gist dey move, e begin change shape.
People go add maggi, dey twist story. Some say na we dey chase Amaka, some say na fight happen. Na so Naija gossip be—once e start, e no dey end.
From Amaka Okoye dey worry us, e turn to she dey chase many guys at once, even people wey get babe.
One post talk say she dey drag married man, another say she dey send food go boys hostel. Na lie, but people dey believe.
Her name begin show for campus confession wall.
Person post say, "Who be that fine girl wey dey follow boys for gate? Amaka, I see you o!" Comments plenty.
Some posts na her roommates dey drop, just to vent:
Dem dey vex, dey say, "If your roommate dey talk for sleep, dey grind teeth, no dey bath for heat, you go understand." Dem talk say, "If trouble dey sleep, na Amaka go wake am."
Like say she no dey bath before bed for heat, no dey care if dem dey alive, dey grind teeth, dey talk for sleep, even dey claim say she date celebrity before.
Some people dey comment say dem hear am dey shout Burna Boy name for night, another say she claim say na Wizkid reply her DM. E no get head.
All this madness na Amaka Okoye trademark.
Even for night, if light no dey, you go hear her dey gist herself. The air for hostel dey heavy, sometimes you smell indomie wey burn, or hear generator dey hum for distance. Everybody for hostel know say, "Amaka wahala dey different."
Normal person for shame, but her own, she update her WhatsApp status join.
She go snap selfie, use filter, write long story. Her own na to own her gist, turn am to content.
I sabi her account, I go check, see this:
"Guys, which kind Nollywood heroine opening be this? See me, the public enemy of girls, the most handsome guy for department dey like me, his fine roommates dey treat me special. But me, I just want simple life, make I get time work small, take care of myself, I go dey okay."
She add like five crying emoji join.
E be like say she get small sense for media. She dey use her wahala build sympathy. People for her contact dey drop love emoji, dey ask if she dey okay.
Her post blow, likes reach hundreds, comments plenty.
One girl type: "God when?" Another drop: "Na you get main character energy o!" Boys dey reply with fire emoji.
Dem dey tag their friends, dey drop "chai" and "God when." Na so gist dey fly for campus.
Some dey ask for full gist, some dey envy her 'main character vibes.'
One guy even comment, "Amaka, na you dey trend o. Make dem no stress you abeg."
My body just dey shake with anger.
My chest tight, I dey read comment dey bite teeth. I just dey pray make this life no repeat itself again.
Even though this her post different from last life, her wahala and wayo still dey the same.
I just dey plan, dey wait make she try nonsense again. This time, no be me dem go use shine.
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