Chapter 6: Honeymoon Highs and Second Thoughts

After the road trip with Natalie, we got our marriage license. We had a destination wedding, no formal banquet, but still invited many friends to celebrate. At dinner, I drank a lot. I was happy—truly happy. I’d finally married the woman I loved. Those miserable days with Rachel were finally over. I felt alive again. Every breath was fresh and joyful.

We toasted with champagne by the hotel pool in Savannah, palm trees swaying, jazz drifting in from a nearby bar. The night was warm and sticky, and Natalie’s friends cheered as we danced barefoot in the grass.

I took a few extra days off. Natalie and I stayed home for days, inseparable. She was flirty and direct, acting spoiled and asking me to buy her gifts. Designer bags and shoes piled up at home, dazzling to the eye.

The front hall looked like a Macy’s display window, boxes stacked in corners, tissue paper everywhere. Natalie paraded around in heels, twirling in front of the mirror, blowing me kisses from across the room.

“Babe, you’re so good. Love you to death.”

Natalie wrapped her arms around my waist—truly fatal. Not like Rachel. Every time I gave her something expensive, not only was she not happy, she’d even say it was flashy and impractical. The more I compared, the more I felt Rachel and I had been a huge mistake.

Rachel and I met through a blind date. My parents liked her job and education—bachelor’s and master’s in law, always worked at the courthouse after graduation. So when I divorced Rachel, both Natalie and I were a little worried. She worked as a judge downtown. If she really got serious, the divorce could get ugly, and I probably wouldn’t come out ahead. Especially that day in the parking lot downstairs, when she caught me and Natalie together. Luckily, Rachel was decisive about the divorce, saving us a lot of trouble.

I thought I had the life I wanted. But after marriage, Natalie became more and more different from the woman I thought I knew.

Sometimes, I’d catch her staring out the window, phone in hand, swiping through Instagram stories of other people’s vacations and weddings. When I asked what was wrong, she’d shrug and toss her hair. “Nothing, babe. I just want us to have it all, you know?” I nodded, but the words settled heavy on my chest.

I closed my eyes, holding Natalie close, and tried to believe this was happiness. But somewhere deep down, I wasn’t sure anymore.