Chapter 6: Alone at the Wheel

5.

Because of how I was raised, I don’t show a bad face to elders easily.

In our fourth year of marriage, after Ethan was born, Derek’s parents moved in—"just to help with the baby." Most of my friends thought it was nuts, letting your in-laws move in. But what could I do? Derek called it "family values."

The first month, his mother held the baby now and then, but soon started complaining about her back. His father had an old knee injury and was no help at all. In the end, they didn’t do much, but Derek still fussed over them.

Even so, after all these years together, I never once lost my temper with them.

But when I heard his mother complaining that morning—her words echoing Derek’s own irresponsibility—I finally snapped. "It’s fine, no one will disturb him anymore. If you and Dad aren’t comfortable, you can go back to your hometown. I can’t change the kids’ routine—they still have to go to school, right?"

My voice came out sharper than I meant, but for once, I didn’t care. I grabbed my bag and left. As I closed the door, I heard her mutter, "Why such a big temper? What kind of life is our Derek living, it’s so miserable."

The guilt and resentment crashed over me as I pulled out of the driveway. The radio played some old pop song about holding on, but I just gripped the wheel and blinked back tears, wishing I could hit fast-forward on my whole life.

I hadn’t even made it to work when Derek called. His voice crackled through the phone, drowned out by some airport announcement. I pressed the phone tighter, my jaw clenched.

"Why did you tell Mom to go back to our hometown? You and the kids aren’t home during the day, they can take care of themselves, and at night they can help you with the kids. Isn’t that good?"

I could hear the frustration in his voice, the chaos of the airport behind him.

"There’s no heating in our hometown, Mom and Aunt Linda don’t get along, they argue all day, and if she gets angry and falls ill, wouldn’t we have to take care of her?"

"Natalie, you’re a good person. Even after what your parents did to you, you still support them. My parents are so kind, how could you not?"

His words stabbed through me. That hellish life at home flashed through my mind, and I almost lost my grip on the steering wheel. My hands were shaking so badly I had to pull over and just breathe, watching the sunlight flicker across my dashboard, and for a second, I wondered what it would feel like to just keep driving and never look back.