Chapter 2: The Breakup and the Secret

I stood there, frozen, staring at the suspicious marks on Chijioke's body, my eyes red and burning.

The way my hand shake, I fit no even hold common sachet water. My legs wan betray me, but pride no gree make I fall.

All I could hear was my best friend shouting at him and Chijioke trying to explain himself.

Voices dey echo for the small hotel room, as if the walls dey mock us. My best friend’s mouth sharp as usual, dey fire Chijioke like market woman fight. Chijioke dey stammer, sweat full him forehead.

I stepped back, dodging his hand, tears pouring down my face.

I feel the sting for my chest, like pepper spray enter my eye. My body dey cold, but my heart dey hot like new suya wey just come out fire.

"Chijioke, so this na your so-called business trip?"

Even my voice dey shake, but I no gree let am break. I dey look am straight, try dey act strong. My heart dey pound like drummer for church.

"Baby, e no be wetin you think! You know say na only you dey my mind..."

Chijioke try reach me, but I dodge am. Na that kind moment wey you go know say love get limit. I just dey eye am, my mouth dey tremble.

"Abeg, no talk again!" I cried out, my chest dey burn. "How you wan explain all these marks for your body?"

As I talk am, my voice rise. E be like all the pain wey I don swallow just burst come out. People for the next room fit hear us, but I no send.

"Baby, abeg, you gats believe me. Na misunderstanding be this."

He talk with voice wey don weak. My own anger dey overshadow am, but inside me, small pity still dey peep.

Chijioke looked down at the marks, his eyes so red like say he wan cry.

He try use hand cover the place, but e too late. Shame dey dance for him face. My best friend dey watch am with eyes wey fit roast yam.

He wanted to talk, but words no gree come out—he just dey look me, begging.

That kind look wey you go use beg your mama after you break her favourite plate. My chest tighten, but I no fit soft.

But I hardened my heart. "Make we break up. I no fit dey with man wey don stain himself."

I swallow spit, force my mouth to move. My voice harsh, but na only way I fit save myself from crying more. E pain me, but I gats do am.

I dey talk strong, but my hand dey shake like generator wey fuel dey finish.

Chijioke staggered like say him leg no strong again, his eyes scatter. "Break up?"

He look me as if na stranger dey stand for his front. Na so men dey act when their world scatter.

"Yes. No come near me again. Just to see you dey make my body vex." I squeezed my fists and forced myself to talk even harsher.

I wipe my tears with the back of my hand, force myself no to break. My best friend dey hold my shoulder, dey squeeze am small small, like say her hand dey pass me courage.

Tears drop like rain as I turn waka commot in shame.

My feet heavy, but I waka out. The ground fit open swallow me, I go thank am. Rain dey fall outside, so my tears join am, nobody fit know the difference.

My best friend quickly chased after me, her voice soft and comforting.

She spread her wrapper over my shoulders, dey shield me from rain and eyes of strangers. Her presence be like cool balm for my wound.

"Kamsi, forget am. Move on. E no deserve your tears. No let man use you do mumu, abeg."

Her words carry that sisterly strength, like the time wey we dey use stick chase stubborn goats from garden.

"This Chijioke no too get sense. Before, I dey envy una two as childhood lovers—he dey pamper you well."

She sigh, her voice low. We dey waka inside puddles, slippers dey splash water everywhere. Okada dey splash water as we waka, conductor dey shout for bus stop.

"I think say he different from other men, but na lie."

She shake head, click tongue. For her eyes, men na just the same story for different wrappers.

My chest dey pain me, I just hug her and cry.

I hold her tight, as if na only that hug fit keep me from breaking finish. I no talk, I just dey sob.

"I really like am, I swear. Why e be say we no fit dey together at the end?"

The question heavy for my mouth. My voice small, almost lost inside the rain noise.

She patted my back, her face full of pity. "Kamsi, even if you love am, e no matter. If man cheat once, he go cheat again."

She rub my back, sigh, like say she don see this kain thing before. Her voice gentle but sharp.

She thought say na heartbreak dey pain me because Chijioke betray me. But wetin really dey pain me be say I gats leave am completely.

I swallow spit, hold my breath, try balance my mind. The wahala deep pass wetin anybody fit see for surface.

Chijioke no cheat, he no sleep with any other person.

I bite my lip, the secret dey burn my tongue. Na only me know the true story, but who go believe?

Na my own plan cause everything.

The guilt na heavy stone for my chest. As I waka under the dark sky, I wonder whether I ever fit forgive myself.