Chapter 4: Halima’s Arrival

I check the date for the acceptance letter, look the calendar for my side.

I count the days, use biro mark calendar, circle the date three times. I hold the letter, reread am. My phone dey vibrate for table, but I no answer. My mind dey far.

I carry pen, quietly mark the day wey I go report. E even be the same day as Uncle Tunde birthday.

I shake my head, small smile for face. Na sign? Or na just coincidence? I dey reason, dey wonder how fate dey play with my life.

Suddenly, I hear knock for my door.

The knock loud, familiar rhythm. I dey freeze. I know na who dey outside before the person even talk.

Na Uncle Tunde.

He push door, step in. The smell of his cologne enter before am. His shoe dey shine. I adjust for bed, wipe my face sharp sharp.

As usual, he knock two times, enter. But this time, one girl follow am.

I dey surprise. My eyes meet the girl own. Her hands dey rest on her lap, her scarf fine, but her eyes dey shadowed.

She sit for wheelchair, wear white dress.

Her dress neat, iron well, the colour white like morning rice. She hold handkerchief, dey twist am. Her legs, or what remain, covered with wrapper.

Her face white like chalk, her eyes carry sadness.

She smile, but na heavy smile. The kind of smile wey you dey see for burial. Her face just dey pale, almost like say she sick. The sadness dey pour out from her body.

She look like breeze go blow am fall.

The way she sit, body frail, her arms thin. If breeze enter, e fit carry her like paper. My heart soft small, but I hide am.

“Jin Yemi, come here,” he tell me.

His voice strong, but I hear tension inside. He dey look me, eyes steady. He want make I come greet, but my body stiff.

I no move, just look the girl. Na Halima be that.

I dey stare, memories dey rush. The wheelchair, the sadness, everything dey trigger old pain. The room quiet, only fan dey hum.

Before, I think say if I no confess, Uncle Tunde no go bring her come meet me. But e be like say wetin go happen go still happen.

I dey realize say, no matter how I try, fate get him own plans. All my efforts na like water wey no get bucket. Some things no fit change.

“Jin Yemi.” Uncle Tunde frown, call my name again.

His brow wrinkle, he dey vex small. He want make I respect tradition, greet visitor. The tension dey rise.

Halima see as I no answer, she lower her eyes, talk soft: “Tunde, no worry. E normal if Miss Yemi no like me for first time wey we meet.”

Her voice soft like morning breeze, barely above whisper. She try smile, but tears dey shine for her eye. She dey shake small, her hand dey clutch armrest.

“If say I dey disturb, I fit go back my papa house for outskirts, no wahala. I no get legs, I no fit waka anywhere. Anywhere I dey, I go manage.”

She dey beg, dey try reduce her own pain. The pity for her voice dey make the room heavy. She dey play humble, but I see the pain deep for her face.

“I no must stay here.”

She look away, eyes red. Na real humility dey flow from her, but also fear. I see am. She no wan be wahala.

As she dey talk, her eyes full with tears wey no gree fall.

She blink fast, like say she dey fight herself. The tears dey gather, but she strong head. My heart shift small, but I still dey guard my own pain.

Like one small flower wey dey pretend say she strong.

Her shoulders high, but her voice dey shake. She wan show say she fit survive, but everybody know say this kain pain no dey hide.

Uncle Tunde frown more, his eye for me dey show say he no happy at all.

He glare, jaw tight. The warning clear. He dey expect me to greet, act mature. His body language sharp.

“Jin Yemi—”

His voice don change, deeper now. Authority full am. I know say if I push am, wahala go set.

“Uncle, anybody you wan arrange to live for house fit live there. You no even need tell me.”

I raise shoulder, talk am flat. My voice cool, no shake. I dey show say I no send again. Na my own small rebellion.

“You be the oga for this house.” My voice calm, no show anything.

I look am straight, no blink. My words dey cut like blade. Silence hang for air.

But for Uncle Tunde ear, e dey sharp like needle.

He wince small, the words dey bite am. I see am swallow, eyes narrow. He dey wonder if na disrespect or pain.

He think say I dey vex.

He dey misread me, but I no care. The tension between us na like two wires wey don touch for transformer.

“Jin Yemi, no talk to me with that kind voice.”

His own voice don rise, warning dey inside. I know say trouble dey come if I push again.

“I bring Halima come today make you meet your small aunty.”

He try explain, voice steady but hard. He dey force me to accept. My heart dey tight.

“Three years ago, when that building collapse happen, she lose her legs to save me. I must look after her. If you still wan stay for this house—”

He point finger, voice get finality. I dey feel the weight. My own wahala dey choke me, but I dey hide am. The story of the accident dey ring for my head.

“Make you stop all this your childish behaviour, no disturb Halima.”

He hiss small, eyes red. The warning clear. If I cross line, he no go spare me. I just swallow spit, hold myself.

The way he look me na warning.

His stare dey burn. Even Halima shrink small for chair. The air thick, nobody talk.

I wan talk, but I just keep quiet.

My mouth open, but words hang. I swallow, close my lips. No need add fire to the quarrel.

Truth be say, I no blame am.

For my heart, I know say I too dey do pass myself. The pain dey plenty, but I no fit continue fight. E go tire person.

I too dey carry Uncle Tunde matter for head.

Since I dey small, na only his approval dey sweet me. I dey guard am like treasure. I dey jealous, dey overdo. Na my own cross.

Since small, I wan be the only person for his eye, the only woman for his side. For years, he no get any woman for side. If any woman try come close, I go find way chase her.

Even when Aunties come church, I dey monitor am. If woman call him for phone, I go ask who be that. I dey sharp, dey block road.

All his special treatment na for me.

From extra meat for soup to last piece of chin chin, na me dey get am. He dey buy me new shoes, dey remember my exam dates. Nobody fit contest am.

So for my last life, when he say he wan marry Halima, my mind scatter.

I break down. I cry, I beg, I threaten. But e no change anything. My own world end that day.

Must you really pay back person wey save your life with marriage?

I dey ask myself that question like say na riddle. Is this how things supposed be? I dey feel say the answer go change everything.

I think am, think am, tire.

For night, I dey stare ceiling, dey roll for bed. My mind no gree rest. The question no gree let me sleep.

I carry my whole life put for the answer.

I invest everything—my youth, my love, my hope. I dey wait for sign, for small sign say e go choose me.

But I still no fit understand. Now I know—some things no get answer.

Na today I realize, life no dey always give answer. Some questions na just wound wey never heal.