Chapter 1: The Rooftop Kiss

When I dey kiss the romantic bad boy for rooftop, na so so comments dey rush flash for my front:

[See as the main babe heart dey scatter for here.]

[Guy, you no try o! The main babe don dey crush on you for five years!]

[Abeg, when this supporting babe go comot? She too dey disturb. Make we see as the main babe go get her own happy ending.]

[No worry, after the main guy and main babe jam, e go remember say e don kiss the supporting girl before, e go regret am die. Na that one go pain pass.]

Sometimes, e be like say all this background noise just dey like radio wey dem no fit off—Naija wahala style. E get as e dey do person mind, but na so the matter be.

So, na story be this about how one playboy take change.

Me, I be the cannon fodder girlfriend for the main guy, Tunde Okoye.

After e go dump me, na there e go meet the real love of him life—the original main babe, that sweet, gentle Halima Musa.

Na so e dey for all those soap opera dem dey show for NTA every evening. But this one na my own turn.

As I dey kiss Tunde Okoye for rooftop, I hear one small noise for back.

That kind sound wey dey make heart skip one beat, like person dey waka for compound where mama dey roast corn for evening.

I open my eye, na so I see one white sleeve just waka disappear behind the rooftop door.

Na then, comments begin rush for my front.

The thing come be like spiritual attack—my eye dey see am clear, but e be only me dey notice. I just huff for inside, try maintain face like say nothing dey happen.

As I gather the clues, everything clear for my head.

I dey live inside novel wey dem write about one bad boy wey later change.

The main guy: Tunde Okoye, the campus fine boy wey get bad name.

The main babe: Halima Musa, the gentle, soft girl wey don dey like Tunde Okoye for long.

Me? I be the villain—the girl wey everybody just like to hate. Sometimes, for night, I dey wonder if anybody ever see the real me.

For this Naija campus, na me everybody go call 'mean girl'. E dey pain sometimes, but waiting man go do?

Na me dem go use show say the main guy get special feelings for the main babe. Na me be the obstacle for their love.

Very soon, the main guy go dump me because I go make wahala, so that him and the main babe go fit start their love story.

All these things dey do me like spiritual revelation. Na so so premonition dey worry me since last week.

As I dey think all this one, I hear one sharp voice for my side:

"Ngozi, wetin you dey think?"

The voice carry that typical Lagos sharpness, as if e dey always ready to crack joke or drag person for play.

I look up, see say na him dey look me with those him playful, sharp eyes.

He lean come kiss me again. I use my hand block am for shoulder:

"Person see us o."

My voice no even loud, but e carry warning, the kind wey girl dey use for boy wey like misbehave.

He look around. "Who be that?"

As the comments dey roll for my face, I look the half-open iron door, answer for my mind:

Na that girl wey you go love pass your own life, one day.

The thing sweet and pain me at the same time. See as story just dey unfold like all those village gist grandmama dey yarn. But for this my own gist, na my heart dem dey use do practice. Who go rescue me when my own wahala land?