I’m the Villain—Please Dump Me! / Chapter 1: Fangs, Frenemies, and Fake Love
I’m the Villain—Please Dump Me!

I’m the Villain—Please Dump Me!

Author: William Rodriguez


Chapter 1: Fangs, Frenemies, and Fake Love

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So, apparently, I woke up as the villainous side-chick in a Mary Sue vampire soap opera. Yeah, you heard me right. One minute I’m minding my own business, the next I’m the walking, talking cautionary tale in someone else’s supernatural drama. Seriously, universe?

Let me tell you, it was like being dropped smack in the middle of a teen drama—except half the cast had fangs and a craving for O-negative. And me? Well, I’d just managed to royally tick off the heroine—and gotten myself killed for it. Awesome start, right?

(I know, I know. In a world where half the main characters are vampires, I’d just picked a fight with the heroine—and then promptly died. Nice job, me.)

Honestly, not wanting to wind up as someone’s midnight snack, I did the only thing a desperate girl could: I latched onto the sweet, pure-hearted second male lead like my life depended on it. Because, let’s be real, it totally did.

I was determined not to get drained, so I went all-in, pretending to be head-over-heels for the second male lead and stuck to him like glue. No shame in survival mode.

Every time he bought breakfast for the heroine, I’d swoop in with my best lovesick grin. “Babe, let me get it. I can’t have you running around for me.” I’d say it loud enough for half the cafeteria to hear. Pretending I was the world’s most devoted girlfriend. If I was going down, I was going down swinging, okay?

When he wanted to drink blood, I immediately bought ten pints of cow’s blood from the butcher and crammed it in his mini-fridge. “I want you to see your favorite thing first thing every morning.” I even left a sticky note with a smiley face. That’s how committed I was. Seriously, I was not about to die for this.

It finally hit me: I was stuck in the supporting girl’s body. Cue the meltdown.

I mean, who wouldn’t be? One second I’m binge-watching cheesy vampire shows, the next I’m living in one—except I’m not the heroine, I’m the mean girl who gets offed in the first act. Whoever’s running this cosmic joke, I hope they’re having a good laugh.

Oh, and to top it all off? Yesterday, the original Savannah trashed the heroine’s mom’s food truck. Today, I’m the one stuck cleaning up her mess.

Great. Just what I needed: a reputation for being a total jerk and a heroine with a grudge. Way to make friends, Savannah. Awesome. Love that for me.

Walking into Maple Heights High, guilt hit me like a brick.

The halls reeked of cheap perfume and pencil shavings, and I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, whispering behind their hands. My stomach twisted into knots. Was this what guilt felt like? Because, wow, it sucked.

“Savannah, hold it right there!”

A voice full of anger rang out behind me.

I froze mid-step. That was Ellie, the heroine herself, and she sounded ready to throw down. My brain short-circuited: Oh crap, here it comes.

I let out a sigh, turned around, and forced what I hoped was a friendly smile.

“Ellie, morning!” I chirped—like we were besties instead of sworn enemies.

Ellie blinked, surprised I’d even try that.

For a split second, she seemed thrown off. Like she wasn’t expecting me to act so… normal. But she recovered fast, scowling like I’d insulted her dog.

Coming back to herself, she snapped, “Savannah, just because your family has money doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want. If you’ve got a problem, take it up with me. Why’d you smash my mom’s truck?” Her hands balled into fists, her eyes flashing with hurt.

Her voice trembled at the end, and I felt a pang of guilt. Great. Now I felt like the world’s biggest jerk. I wanted to shrink into my shoes.

“Sorry, sorry, that was my bad. Seriously.”

I fumbled for words, my cheeks burning. God, this was awkward. How do you apologize for something you technically didn’t do? “Seriously, I’m really sorry, Ellie. I messed up.”

Suddenly, I caught a glimpse of someone in white under the maple tree outside. Panic hit me all over again.

My eyes darted to the window. Was that Julian? My heart skipped. I was already in hot water—did I really need a vampire audience for my humiliation? Because, sure, why not.

“How about this: you figure out how much you lost, and I’ll pay you back.” I cringed inside even as I said it.

Yeah, I regretted it the second it left my mouth.

Money can’t fix everything. Especially not in a small town like this. Offering cash just made me look like a spoiled brat. I wanted to take the words back, but it was too late.

Of course. With Ellie’s personality, she’d totally think I was looking down on her.

Sure enough, Ellie’s plain, stubborn face got even angrier. She jabbed her finger at me, sputtering, “You—” and just stood there, fuming.

She looked like she wanted to say a hundred things at once. Her face was red, and her eyes were shining with tears she was fighting not to shed. Oh no. Tears. I was doomed.

“I might not have money, but I’ve got dignity. Don’t push people too far.” She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, voice wobbling.

She wiped her eye and turned to run. And just like that, she was gone.

The sight of her swiping at her face hit me harder than I expected. I reached out, but she was already gone. Ouch.

She cried?

I just stood there, useless, as Ellie ran farther and farther away.

I stood there, feeling like the world’s worst person. My throat tightened. Was this what it felt like to actually hurt someone? My stomach twisted with guilt. Seriously, Savannah, you’re the worst.

Then I remembered the guy under the maple tree. Silver hair, white shirt, wind ruffling his bangs. He caught my gaze and smiled.

He looked ethereal, almost unreal—the kind of guy you’d expect to see in a perfume commercial, not hanging around outside a high school. His eyes met mine, and my blood ran cold.

I was so freaked out my back went cold, my legs went to jelly, and I almost collapsed. Not good. Not good at all.

I gripped the strap of my backpack so hard my knuckles turned white. If I fainted right now, I’d be vampire chow for sure. That would be so on brand.

According to the book, the second male lead, Julian Blackwood, was the hottest guy at Maple Heights—a vampire who’d been around for two centuries.

He was the kind of guy who made straight-A students forget their homework and had the teachers tripping over themselves. Too bad he was also the reason the original Savannah ended up six feet under. Yikes.

First day of school, the heroine says one thing, and boom—he’s in love.

She’d said, “Vampires drink blood to survive, just like we eat burgers. I don’t think that makes them evil.”

And just like that, she’d won his undead heart. Meanwhile, Savannah was busy being the world’s worst supporting character. Story of my (new) life.

He caught Savannah bullying the heroine. Next thing you know, he drags her behind the gym, calls in a vampire posse, and they drain her dry.

Julian thought she was dirty and wouldn’t even finish her off himself. Ouch, dude.

That’s right. He left her for the other vampires, didn’t even bother to end it himself. Classy.

Thinking of this, I wanted to slip away, but I was so flustered and my legs so weak that I tripped after only a few steps.

My sneaker caught on the linoleum, and I went sprawling, arms flailing. This was not my day. Classic Savannah move.

Just when I thought my pretty face was doomed, I fell into an embrace that smelled like cherry blossoms. Or maybe just really expensive cologne.

His arms were surprisingly strong, holding me steady. I blinked up at him, dazed. Is this what swooning feels like?

“Hey, you alright?”

His gentle voice startled a "thanks" out of me.

His voice was warm, but there was a cool edge to it, like he was used to being in control. My heart did a weird little flip. Seriously, heart?

“N-no problem, class is starting, gotta go, bye!”

I stammered, practically tripping over my own feet as I tried to escape. My cheeks burned. I probably looked like a deer in headlights. Just great.

Julian’s gray eyes flashed with annoyance. He grabbed my wrist and pointed at my scraped knee, which I hadn’t even noticed. “You’re bleeding. I’ll take you to the nurse.”

He sounded so calm, but there was a glint in his eyes that made me uneasy. I tried to pull my hand away, but his grip was like iron. So much for escape.

I looked around for help, but it was already class time—only Julian and I were left in the hallway. Of course.

The halls were eerily quiet, lockers closed, doors shut. I was trapped, and I knew it.

“Julian!” My voice cracked with panic.

Bracing myself, I pulled out the garlic and crucifix I’d stashed in my backpack, and slapped them right on Julian’s face. Please work, please work.

The crucifix left a red mark on his cheek. I winced, waiting for him to burst into flames or something.

Julian stared at the cross and garlic in my hand, his expression confused, maybe even a little amused.

He looked more confused than anything, like I’d just offered him a stick of gum instead of a holy relic. This was not in the script.

“Uh, I… here, have some garlic?” I squeaked, my hand shaking.

I was about to cry.

I could feel tears prickling behind my eyes. Was I about to get eaten? Why wasn’t this working? Come on, Hollywood lied to me!

He stared at me for two seconds, narrowed his eyes, and tightened his grip on my wrist. My panic shot through the roof.

“C’mon. Let’s get you to the nurse.”

Even I could hear the threat in his voice.

His tone was soft, but there was no room for argument. My stomach dropped. Uh oh.

Just as I was about to despair, the bald vice principal shouted from down the hall, “Hey! You two! What class are you in? Why aren’t you in homeroom?” Sweet, sweet adult intervention!

The vice principal’s voice echoed down the corridor, sharp as a whistle. I’d never been so grateful for an authority figure in my life.

Taking advantage of Julian’s loosened grip, I broke free and bolted for the classroom. Freedom!

I didn’t look back, just booked it, practically diving through the classroom door.

In the original, vampires were supposed to be afraid of crosses and garlic. Huh.

But just now, Julian seemed totally fine. Uh, plot hole?

My mind raced. Was this a plot hole? Or did American vampires just have different rules? Either way, I was in trouble. Big trouble.

Heart pounding, I slipped into class. Please don’t let anyone notice.

I tried to act casual, but my hands were shaking. I slid into my seat, praying no one would notice. Breathe, Savannah, breathe.

It was mid-lesson, and the second I opened the door, all the students and the teacher looked up at me. Kill me now.

Every eye in the room was on me. I forced a smile and mumbled an apology. Please, just let me disappear.

Luckily, the teacher didn’t make a big deal. Bless her soul.

She just nodded, motioned for me to sit, and went back to her lesson. Bless her.

After class, two girls surrounded my desk, chattering away. Here we go again.

Their voices were high and excited, already gossiping before I’d even had a chance to breathe. Can’t a girl catch a break?

I glanced at their student IDs. Gotta know your enemies.

Mariah Brooks and Zoe Anderson. Of course.

Both wore pastel cardigans and had that effortless cheerleader energy. They were Savannah’s ride-or-die girls, which meant trouble for me. Just my luck.

Friends of the original Savannah—and the ones who helped trash the heroine’s mom’s food truck. Guilty by association.

I tried to look as innocent as possible, but my nerves were shot. I could feel the weight of what they’d done hanging over me. Not good.

“Savvy, guess who I just saw?” Mariah cupped her cheeks, looking starstruck. Here we go.

She practically bounced in her seat, eyes wide like she’d seen a celebrity. Girl, chill.

Zoe was just as lovestruck. “It was Prince Julian! I can’t believe we saw him again—he barely ever comes to school. Too bad, Savvy, you missed it.”

They both sighed dramatically, like Julian was some pop idol. I tried not to roll my eyes. Please.

In the original, Julian rarely showed up—maybe a few times a year. Mysterious much?

He was like a ghost: beautiful, mysterious, and impossible to pin down. Girls at Maple Heights talked about him like he was a legend. Sigh.

Last time was at the start of school, when he spoke to Ellie and then got stalked by the original Savannah. Yikes, past me.

The memory sent a chill down my spine. I had to tread carefully. Don’t repeat history, Savannah.

When I heard the word “prince,” I shivered. Ugh.

Not that I missed out. I almost got killed by him.

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