Chapter 1: Gist, Slaps, and Betrayal

Morning, Mama Ukamaka dey shout for her twins, somebody dey fry akara, and one small boy dey chase goat for corridor. Na so our compound dey every morning—noise everywhere, everybody sabi everybody business, gossip fit reach your ear before your own shadow tell you. Me and Ifedike dey date, we dey live together for one small rented face-me-I-face-you for the outskirts of Makurdi.

Our compound no dey quiet—everybody sabi everybody business, gist fit land for your doorstep before you even chop breakfast. Na here we dey, managing the little space we get, no privacy, but e still be our home. At night, when PHCN carry light, we go just sit for corridor, dey fan ourselves with old magazine, gist dey flow like river Benue after rain.

Lately, the guy just dey waka commot early, dey come back late, I hardly dey see am for house at all.

Sometimes, na only him smell go remain for pillow, and my body go dey cold as if harmattan dey outside. I go dey wonder if na me do something or if money matter dey pursue am up and down. Neighbours go dey watch, some go dey look me with eye wey dey talk, 'Madam, your oga don dey lose interest o.'

One day, vex catch me, I slap am.

My hand hang for air, shock freeze me. Wetin I just do? My chest dey drum, but my mind dey blank. The sound loud pass generator wey no get silencer. Mosquitoes even pause their biting that minute. My heart dey beat like village drum for New Yam festival.

WhatsApp status and group chats begin rush in:

[The Odogwu just wan bring out engagement ring from him pocket, na so madam wahala slap am. 😂🔥🙆‍♀️]

[If only fine geh fit calm down small, all the money wey Odogwu go make for future no go end for main babe hand. Las las, na breakfast she go chop.]

[With that one slap, Odogwu don lose the last respect wey remain. From today, both of them go waka their separate ways...]

For this Naija, nothing dey hide. If dem no see you, dem go still hear your story. My phone buzz like say market dey inside. Even my cousin for Otukpo send me screenshot.

I close my eyes, use the back of my hand give am another slap.

This one sweet me for chest, like say I dey fight for my mama pride. My neighbours, wey dey peep through their curtains—small Chukwudi dey peep from window, eye wide, ready to run go gist Mama—go get gist for next day.