Chapter 3: Halima Plan, Family Drama

The first six times, I just swallow my pride, beg, humble myself, dey talk anyhow just to make Mama happy.

I go dey call her, dey send long prayer message, dey apologize like say I thief. I go dey call my aunties make dem help beg am. Sometimes, I go even send voice note, dey cry small.

I be like dog, Mama dey hold my neck with allowance as leash.

E pain me, but e true. Every time I see alert, I dey feel like person wey dem just free from police cell.

I dey suffer, but fear no gree me break free.

I dey always dey think say if I vex, she go just block me. Family nor dey support person wey dey form strong head. Na the allowance dey tie me like wrapper.

I just comot house, dey timid, still dey hold hope for family. I think say, even if everybody abandon me, house go still dey.

The love for home dey sweet, but na that same home dey burn me like pepper soup. Sometimes, I dey wonder if I fit ever fit please Mama.

But now I understand: since I comot house, no wahala dey outside. Na from Mama and that house all my pain dey come.

E shock me when I realise say for school, everybody dey hustle, but na only my own wahala dey follow me reach dream. My mind nor rest.

I slouch for my table, dey calculate for my note book.

I dey use biro wey almost finish ink, dey arrange expense: Data, feeding, pad, print-out. My handwriting dey shake. My calculator dey fear me.

₦40,000 for one month. E go hard o.

I dey reason whether to sell my wig for Instagram. Even my phone sef, I dey see am as investment, but how I wan take survive without am?

Na that time my roommate Halima come back from class, invite me to try canteen new goat meat jollof rice.

Halima, na better person. Her smile dey always bright. She dey enter room with ginger, her shoe dey clap for corridor. She wave at me, dey dance small, say, "Morayo, you go follow chop this jollof? Goat meat dey!

My belle just dey turn. That goat meat rice na ₦1,800—my money no reach.

I look am, dey wish say na me get that kind free hand. My mouth dey water, but my pocket dey dry like harmattan lips.

I just force smile tell her say I wan do diet, so I no go chop dinner.

Na lie I dey talk, but as I dey form healthy living, my stomach dey protest. Hunger nor dey gree do diet o!

My stomach just grumble, like say e dey vex. I look am with side eye—then I feel one kind warm for body.

As I shift for chair, I know say wahala dey—my monthly visitor don land. Na that time I remember say pad don finish. The matter con serious.

Ah, period don show?

I shake my head, dey wonder why e be say wahala dey always double up. My mind dey run, dey count pad, dey reason how to last two days with one liner.

I open drawer, na only one small panty liner dey hide for corner.

I dey look am like gold. Na so my life reach? I dey talk to myself: "See Morayo, better hustle o!"

That ₦10,000 wey I just collect, I don use pay class dues—the class rep don dey chase me since, no choice.

Class rep dey waka round like town crier, dey disturb everybody. If you no pay, na your own wahala.

Only ₦360 remain for my bank app. My part-time pay go land tomorrow.

I dey pray say make the pay come early. My mind dey calculate how to stretch ₦360 till daybreak. Hunger and period dey drag me left and right.

I no even get money buy pad.

I dey look window, dey think say maybe I go just manage tissue, but tissue nor be pad o. The struggle real.

I just lie down for table, weak.

My body dey heavy, my eye dey red. I dey pray make Halima nor notice say I dey cry small.

Halima see as I dey, she come ask gently, “Morayo, your mama no wan send you money again?”

Her voice dey soft, like person wey dey pity you. I just nod, my eye dey water. Na shame dey catch me.

I sigh. “No be say she no dey send, na just ₦40,000 a month, ₦10,000 per week. If I no manage am well, I go stranded before month end. To ask Mama for more? Na war.”

I dey explain, my voice dey low. I nor wan sound like person wey dey complain, but my body no fit pretend.

Last month, I pass allowance with ₦10,000 because I buy extra books.

I dey reason say education na investment, but Mama no dey hear that side. Book, na book, for her eye.

After I explain, Mama just finish me with insult.

She drag me for group chat, even call my aunty to join mouth. E dey pain.

She say for her time, no need all this extra book—just copy question, practice, still do well.

I dey imagine her dey arrange exercise book with Biro, dey solve maths with candle light. For my mind, things don change but she no gree.

She say I too dey enjoy, no sabi money value.

Na that word dey pain me pass. Enjoy? I dey ration indomie, dey hustle for tissue paper, but still dey suffer for enjoyment?

She talk for one hour, in front of my whole hostel.

Hostel girls dey peep inside, dey try decode who be Morayo wey dey collect wotowoto from mama. Na shame catch me.

Mama own dey choke me, my roommates own dey pity me, e just shame me more.

Halima dey look me with big eye, dey try form say she nor hear, but I sabi say e pain her too.

Since then, my roommates no dey invite me for expensive food again, dem dey find cheap food for canteen so all of us fit save money.

E dey sweet me small say dem dey consider me, but I dey wish say I fit do more for myself. Friendship for Ibadan dey different—na who you dey eat with be your real person.

Especially Halima—Ibadan babe, fine, kind, she dey always share food with me.

She dey chop like queen, but she go shift her rice, carry one big goat meat drop for my plate, dey form say she nor too hungry. For my pride, she dey find excuse make I help her do errand, arrange note, or help with materials, so e go be like say I earn my own.

I dey help her type assignment, dey iron her scarf, dey run errand, just to balance am. She sabi my kind of pride, she dey respect am.

When she hear about my mama new allowance wahala, her eye open, she knock table:

She vex, her voice rise, even people for corridor hear her. Halima no dey hide mouth when e pain her.

“Which kind mama be this? Even wicked stepmother for Nollywood nor dey do pass this one! ₦40,000 for one month? Wetin you wan do with am? Girl like you—just buy one thing, e don pass ₦40,000!

Still dey pay in bits, dey keep account? Na 21st-century stinginess be this!

Morayo, forget her money. From now, just dey follow me chop and live better! ₦300,000 a month—no, ₦500,000!”

Her voice dey high, her hand dey fly everywhere. She dey act like say she be Igwe for hostel.

I quickly wave hand, thank her.

I dey blush, dey shy. I sabi say she dey talk am from heart, but na so friendship dey sweet.

She no be my mama; she no owe me anything.

E dey pain me say I dey depend on friend, but I get sense say no be pride go kill me for Ibadan.

Abeg, worst case, I go hustle more part-time. Way dey.

I dey think say maybe I go try sell puff-puff for class, or dey do hair for girls on Sunday. As hustle dey come, na so I dey jot am for phone.

As I talk am, I just gather myself, open laptop, dey search for better part-time work nearby.

I dey scroll through WhatsApp group, dey see people dey advertise home lesson, laundry, even MC job. My eye dey red, my brain dey hot, but I nor dey give up.

Halima press my laptop down, her eye dey shine:

Her eyes dey do like say she get secret. Her smile dey wide, I dey fear small.

“Morayo, I get idea—make we try am?

Way wey go make your mama rush give you money by herself.”

She dey whisper, dey behave like person wey get coded plan. Me sef dey look am, dey reason whether na prank or real gist.

“The reason your mama dey squeeze you, no dey give you enough, na because she know say you no go rebel. You too dey obey.

Halima dey talk as if she be psychologist. She dey point finger, dey shake head. Me sef dey nod, dey listen.

No matter how she treat you, she feel say na her charity, and you no fit survive without her.

E pain me, but I know say Halima dey talk true. My own head dey too soft sometimes.

So, if you break her control, na she go begin chase you for ground.”

She dey smile, dey tap table. I dey look her, dey try connect her plan. E be like Yoruba film wey the twist never land.

Halima break am down. I no too understand. “So wetin I go do?”

My voice low, but my eye dey shine small. I dey hope say she no dey talk make I go thief!

She wink. “Go find one yellow-haired guy, snap picture, post for WhatsApp status, thank am for how e dey spend for you.

No be real spending o—just make am look like say na only cup of zobo dey make you fall, like say you fit die for am.

Let your mama see say if she no care for her pikin, no give her food or cloth, na one yellow-haired guy go carry her go with just one cup of zobo.

I swear, she go beg you break up and send you allowance sharp sharp!”

Her plan dey wild, but e dey sweet me small. Na drama wey fit scatter group chat. My heart dey beat, but I dey reason am.

I no too believe am. E go work?

I dey laugh, dey fear, dey expect wahala. For my mind, I dey talk say, "Make I try am, shebi na once person dey craze."

But Halima no dey waste time—she drag me go drama club, find one slim guy wey dey wear yellow wig, snap us together.

The guy sef dey form pose, dey flex muscle, dey show peace sign. Halima dey ginger us, dey direct like film director. We laugh tire.

She even help write caption: “Na only man wey fit spend for me na him dey try.” Set am make only Mama see am.

We set the privacy for WhatsApp, do as Halima plan. I dey watch my phone dey shake.

After all, I just dey wait, my mind dey shake.

My heart dey drum, my hand dey sweat. My mind dey fly—if this one backfire, na village meeting go reach my head. I dey hope say the plan no go backfire.

Halima pat my hand, say make I relax.

She dey smile, dey whisper, "E go work, just chill." Her confidence dey ginger me.

True true, no reach five minutes, Mama WhatsApp video call enter.

Her green scarf tie tight, eyebrow high like say she dey ready for fight. Her face full for screen, her eyebrow high. She no dey smile. Na serious matter.

With Halima beside me, I take deep breath pick am. “Hello, Mama, wetin happen?”

I dey act cool, but I dey shake for body. Halima squeeze my hand under table, dey signal make I stand strong.

Before I fit finish, Mama voice just burst for phone:

Her voice loud, her words dey tumble over each other. I fit feel the fire through my ear piece.

“Morayo, you don fall hand finish! You dey date anyhow for our back—na man you dey find like this?

And who be that one, see as e dress? No be better person.

We dey starve you for house? We no dey take care of you? Na man you wan dey beg for food and drink? You dey disgrace us!

I don tell your papa: girl wey no dey stay house no suppose go far school. Make we rest and avoid shame!”

As she dey talk, my heart dey race, my hand dey shake. I dey wish make Halima fit press pause for Mama mouth.

…

I just dey mute, my breath short. My eye dey wet, but I nor wan cry. Halima hold my hand strong. She dey look me like say she go fight for me.

E be like say person knock me for head. My body just weak—thank God say Halima dey to hold me.

Her eyes dey red, she dey bite lip. She dey try pass me courage, her hand dey rub my back small small. She rub my back, dey whisper, "No cry, I dey your side."

She look me with pity, grip my hand tight.

Halima dey signal make I no break down. Na so I gather all my ginger, raise my head.

I gather courage, cut in: “Mama, if you no give me allowance, na who I see help me, I go collect. Whether na yellow hair or white hair, good or bad, anybody wey show me care na good person for my eye.”

As I talk am, my voice shake but I nor stop. E pain me, but na truth. For my mind, na who feed you be your family when hunger dey wire you.

I just cut call, no let her rant finish.

I press red button sharp sharp. I nor wan hear more insult.

Halima look worried, she stammer: “Morayo, sorry—na my bad idea. I no know Aunty go vex reach like this.

Before, if I joke say I get boyfriend, my mama go panic, rush send me money, dey fear say I go jam useless boy. I think say all parents dey like that.”

Her own experience different. I dey laugh small, dey shake head. I dey wish say my mama go ever panic for my happiness.

I pat her hand. “No mind am, your mama no be my mama. My own na control and face she dey care about. As for yellow hair, she no even send.

Na me just dey useless, dey disgrace myself.”

Halima dey shake her head, dey try hug me. I just smile, dey rub her back, make e no pain her.

I laugh small. “Well, e don be. Mama fit vex, even the ₦40,000 self she go collect am back. From now, na you I go depend on o.

Abeg, Your Highness, help this your humble servant find more part-time work!”

I dey form like palace maid, dey bow for Halima, she just burst laugh. E relieve the tension.

Halima burst laugh, the tension for room just clear.

Her laugh dey loud, e enter corridor, other roommates join dey ask, "Wetin dey sup for una room?" E be like breeze blow the wahala comot.

That time, my cousin call, her voice rush:

Her name dey show for Truecaller: Ayo – Family Gist. She dey always carry amebo. Her voice dey rush, dey shake.

“Morayo, go check family WhatsApp group—see wetin your mama dey do again!”

I grab my phone, my hand dey shake. I know say if family group enter matter, wahala fit reach papa side, uncle side. I dey brace myself. Wetin mama post this time? My heart dey beat, I dey open WhatsApp, dey pray say make e no bad pass the last time. I click the group, my heart dey pound—if wahala dey, e go full ground.