Chapter 2: Grandpa Birthday—Secrets Burst Out

Na Grandpa 80th birthday, na rare time wey all the family gather. My babe, Morayo, follow me come, even bring better supplement as gift.

The house full, the air dey smell of jollof rice, small chops, and that old grandfather perfume wey dey remind you say age dey. People dey laugh, dey snap picture, but e get that undercurrent tension wey dey always dey for big family party.

I think say this one go be peaceful family reunion, everybody go just dey gist dey catch up. But wahala start as we never even settle down finish.

Before anybody fit say jack, na my cousin wife start am. She just dey look Morayo up and down, then talk with one kind mocking voice, "Ah ah, see Tunde babe—too fair and slim. I dey wonder if she fit handle wedding stress when the time reach o."

Her voice get one kind sharp edge, she talk am so that everybody fit hear. She purse her mouth, smirk, come look her husband for eye.

Me I just dey gist with other people, I no reason am, just answer anyhow, "Na why we no go do big ceremony for house. We dey go Calabar do destination wedding."

I talk am with one kind half-laugh, make the matter die there. I no wan Morayo dey feel anyhow for inside house wey no be her own. She just squeeze my hand under table, give me eye like make I no mind them.

One aunty pass by with tray of moi-moi and zobo, but nobody dey chop again. Me and Morayo no like wahala. Just to think about all those traditional wedding wahala dey give us headache. So as we fix date, we agree say make we just carry our parents go Calabar, do am simple, enjoy small vacation join.

Even Morayo mama sef thank me say I get sense. Her papa talk say make I no mind anybody wey go dey talk, na so dem take do their own wedding for Ibadan that year. We just wan chop life small.

Both parents support us well. We don book wedding planner, hotel, everything set. Na just to go remain for two months time.

Morayo dey show me the invitation card design for her phone, her eye dey shine. Me sef dey happy—finally, I fit breathe without all the family drama.

As I talk am, my cousin wife shock, but my cousin sharply raise head from him phone, dey para: "Destination wedding? Wetin you mean?"

He talk am like say I talk say I wan travel go moon. Everybody head turn, people begin press phone under table, dey peep gist.

I confuse small, then remember say destination wedding no too common for here—maybe he no understand. So I bring out the plan wey Calabar people send me, wan explain.

I even wan show am the hotel pictures, make dem see say na correct place, but before I fit say anything, wahala don land.

But before I talk, my cousin don frown, raise voice: "No need explain! I sabi wetin be destination wedding!"

Him voice just scatter the room. One of the aunties for kitchen even stick head out, dey listen. Morayo look me like, 'wetin be all this?'

I try talk again, he cut me: "Abeg, forget that one. I wan know—una go fetch bride for house or not? Your babe own bridesmaids dey come or not?"

He no wan gree, na only tradition dey him mind. He dey count the ceremony like say na him money go run am. I just dey look the guy, e be like say wahala dey always sweet am.

I shock: "Since na destination wedding, bride-fetching no dey, bridesmaids no go come."

I try talk am soft, make the matter no escalate, but the thing be like say I pour petrol for fire.

That one just vex am. He knock table, stand up:

Even the table sef dey fear the guy. Some drink for table nearly fall. Morayo just squeeze my hand tighter, she don dey tire.

"I dey tell you, I no gree!"

He eye dey red, mouth dey shake. The way he dey stand, e be like say na campaign rally he dey. People begin dey shift seat, dey prepare for drama.

"If na destination wedding, how my guys go do?"

He look some boys for corner, them nod like say dem no get work. This matter don pass wedding, na ego dey talk now.

Just two words, me and Morayo brain just hang.

We just look each other, the rice for my mouth no even sweet again. Morayo eye dey shine, but na from tension.

Na our wedding o. We agree, both parents agree, but he say he no gree? Who him be?

I dey ask myself—since when my cousin become chief protocol for my marriage? If to say I get mind, I for just carry bottle, burst am for table, but I just dey swallow am.

We be family, but since small, na so so bullying he dey do me. After I go city for primary school, we no dey see each other except for Christmas or festival—no be say love dey between us. And how my wedding take concern him guys?

I remember that time he use sand pour my garri just because I no give am chewing gum. Old wounds dey scratch me for body as I remember how he dey always collect my meat pie that year, dey use seniority press me. This one na new level.

He make the wahala so tey everywhere quiet, everybody dey look.

You fit hear pin drop. Even Grandpa stop him gist, just dey look as drama dey unfold. Some people dey cough small, others dey play with plate.

My papa, wey dey gist before, try calm everywhere. He call everybody make we chop, come warn my cousin softly: "Auwalu, all your family dey here, even Grandpa. Abeg respect yourself."

He talk am with that kind deep voice wey papa dey use settle market fight. He even squeeze my cousin shoulder, like make e rest.

"Tunde don talk the destination wedding with us. Me and your second aunty agree—everything settle."

He look other elders for support, nod head, then pass fish to Grandpa. He dey try use food cool the tension.

"Abeg, make we no talk this matter again. Everybody sit chop."

Papa just dey try make peace, but Auwalu no send am:

The guy just bone face, cross leg, like say na him get the land. Some elders dey shift chair, dey avoid eye contact.

"Settle? Abeg."

He look papa for eye: "Second Uncle, your family get money. Tunde and him wife dey make plenty money every year, but all una sabi na to chop am for una body, no wan do party for us!"

He drag the 'us' long, sweep hand across the room. Na so the real jealousy dey show.

"Because una dey make money, una dey look us wey no get money like say we no reach una level? Second Uncle, na so you dey look down on me and the rest family."

He tap chest, then look other relatives: "Abi I talk lie?"

Some relatives wey just dey watch begin shift body—some sef nod.

One uncle for corner just dey say 'hmmm', another aunty dey whisper for her pikin ear. You go think say na election campaign we dey do.

As he see say people dey support am, Auwalu just raise shoulder, wave hand: "Tunde, make I tell you, you must host us for your wedding, and e must be Hennessy and St. Moritz. This Chelsea wey una serve today, I no send am."

He eye the Chelsea like say e be sin to drink am. Some people even burst small laugh. Party no complete without correct drinks!

Even for my university days, na people wey get money dey buy am. E dey pain me say na me dem dey use catch cruise.

So na this be the koko.

Na so e be. No be about tradition—na about flex, about chop, about who go show who. For my family, dem fit use burial, naming, even dog birthday chop your money. Nobody wan carry last.

Auwalu people like chop and run. For years, na my family dey pay for Grandpa everything. Uncle sef dey chop Grandpa money for back.

E get one time dem say Grandpa get malaria, na my papa run pay hospital bill. Uncle go say him pikin need to go school, my papa go still bring out. But anytime wey enjoyment show, na dem first land.

This birthday, na my family pay all the bills, but Auwalu carry invite plenty distant family and villagers, dey flex for them—no even talk say na my papa pay.

Him even dey take phone snap picture with people, dey form big man, no even mention say na my papa run things. People for village dey hail am, no know say na him just chop.

Just now, I even see am pack some Chelsea enter him wife bag.

She do am sharp sharp, like person wey dey thief meat for pot. My mama see am, just shake head, no talk. Family politics no dey finish.

My papa dey always reason say uncle family dey struggle, so he dey close eye—he even dey add extra money for Grandpa make uncle dey take, help Auwalu buy car, buy house.

Even my mama dey ask papa one time: "All this your giving, dem go ever appreciate you?" Papa go just say, "Family no dey finish. If I no do, who go do?"

But now, Auwalu still dey yarn rubbish, everywhere quiet. Papa face don change.

That one surprise me. Papa wey no dey quick vex, eye don red. Him mouth just dey press, he no even dey chop again.

I just swallow my anger, try talk calm: "Auwalu, abeg no worry yourself."

I talk am soft, make e no be like say I dey fight. I just wan make matter end.

"We don plan say after the destination wedding, we go do thank-you party for this same hotel. We don book hall. Cigarette, drink, sweet, tea, chop money—everything set. We even prepare extra gift for everybody. Nothing go miss, we no dey disrespect anybody at all."

I even wave the hotel receipt for air. I mention 'chop money' well, make dem know say nobody go go house empty-handed. For family here, na that one dey matter pass.

If you no drop chop money, people go talk for years. Even naming ceremony, naming money must drop. Na so we dey do am.

When I talk this wedding plan with papa, e first reason am, but when he hear say we go do thank-you party, he relax, agree sharp.

My mama even hug me that day say I get sense. "No vex, Tunde, na family wahala be this. Just do your own, make dem rest."

After I talk, the relatives face calm down.

People begin dey nod, some dey smile. One aunty even clap hand softly, say, "Na so! Young people get their way, make we support dem."

For years, my family dey help home people, no dey miss gift or chop money. Somebody even talk for us:

E be like say na voice for my side: "Abeg, Auwalu, no be your second uncle family talk say dem go do thank-you party? Na just the ceremony dem no do—dem no leave any tradition."

One of my elder cousins even nod, say, "Wetin remain again? Thank-you party dey, gift dey, chop dey. Auwalu, abeg, rest."

"True talk, new generation, new way. Any style wey the young people like dey okay. No dey put mouth too much."

One small boy for ground even shout, "Uncle Auwalu, na jollof rice dey hungry me o!"

"Yes now, you talk make dem host, dem say dem go host. Make we chop—today na Grandpa birthday, no spoil old man mood."

Person drop spoon for plate, people begin dey serve food again. E be like say small peace wan return.

As Auwalu hear say dem go do party, other people support am, e be like say if he just sit down, matter go end.

But instead, him face come worse. He no wan sit, but no fit talk anything again.

He just dey look me, then sharply knock table again:

The table nearly break this time. Some of the children begin dey shift go their mama side.

"E never do! Tunde, you must do ceremony for house!"

He dey point finger, vein for neck dey show. I just dey wonder whether na my wedding or na family contest.

"Even if these people no mind, my papa and Grandpa agree? Me nko?"

He no even dey breathe well again. Some people dey shake head, but na like say na old tradition dey fight new style.

"Na only your family get say for your wedding? Wetin your second uncle and aunty talk no count."

He dey drag the thing, like say na government council dey here. I dey look am with side-eye.

"My papa na first son for Adeyemi family. Me na first grandson. Adeyemi family dey always do traditional wedding—you no fit break am. Better hear word, if not, you no dey respect family, you dey shame your ancestors!"

He no send my papa try cut am off, he just face my uncle wey never talk: "Papa, I dey talk lie?"

The room cold. Even the AC no chill reach like the silence. Everybody dey look Grandpa.

Na so the wahala start again—first son, first grandson, family tradition, disrespect. Which year we dey? Na destination wedding I wan do, no be say I dey dig Adeyemi family grave.

Person fit laugh if e no pain. For my mind, I dey count all the times wey dem use tradition hold person down for this country.

Uncle fold hand, look Auwalu, then look my papa with fake smile: "Na true, old second. Auwalu talk well. You no fit ignore your big brother and papa."

He talk am with that 'I pass you' tone. He cross leg, adjust cap. Some people dey nod, some dey form neutral.

He look Grandpa: "Papa, how you see am?"

Everybody face turn Grandpa side, I see small hope for papa face.

The tension heavy, na only the sound of soup being stirred for kitchen dey enter ear. Morayo just dey squeeze my hand, her finger cold.

Grandpa drop him cup, clear throat, look my papa with vex: "Old second, na so I train you? You must hear your big brother—he be first son."

The old man dey shake small as he talk, voice strong. Even the little children pause, dey look Grandpa.

He hiss: "All these years, you just dey flex for city. That small money wey you dey send me no reach anything. E no reach as your brother and Auwalu dey take care of me for here. You dey make money, but you no buy house or car for Auwalu. Na only your wife and pikin you dey reason. You no sabi your place. I for no even born you."

The words sting sharp, like koboko. My papa just freeze, hand still dey hold fish, but e no fit chop again. For him eye, na rain dey fall inside house. Everybody dey feel am. Even some of the uncles dey shake head in pity.

"Abeg, people too plenty here. I no go talk too much. Tunde wedding go be as Auwalu talk am."

Grandpa just drop the final hammer. The room freeze. For my papa eye, na only shadow remain, hope don run.

The hope for papa eye just die. After all the years wey he dey endure, spend money and effort, na "I for no even born you" he collect.

E pain me, e pain my mama. Even my small sister wey dey wash plate for kitchen hear am, she nearly drop cup.

This na man wey start from scratch, suffer, hustle, face wahala, but I never see am look so defeated.

I remember all the nights papa dey come back late, sweat dey drip, dey calculate how to send money go village. My chest just dey burn.

My mind just mix—pain, anger, and one kain heavy sense of injustice.

I dey remember every little thing papa do—how he pay for cousin school, how he buy new TV for village house, how dem dey run come him side for help. But now, see as dem treat am.

E don do. If papa wan still endure, me I no go gree again.

This na turning point. For my mind, I dey vow—today, e no go end like this.

Endure for wetin?

Na big question. Wetin person dey gain if e dey take nonsense because of family?

People full everywhere, na correct time to settle old and new wahala!

E be like say spirit of my city days enter me. My back straighten, hand don dey shake small. Everybody still dey look.

I just hold my anger, turn, softly pat Morayo hand: "Babe, abeg go house first, or go chop better food, maybe see film. E go soon loud for here, I no wan make you vex."

I smile for her, use eyes beg, make she no follow see disgrace. Na so we dey protect our own for this side.

Before Morayo fit answer, my cousin wife just shout with mocking laugh: "Ah ah, see Tunde babe—no fit hear small talk from family. People go think say you marry princess o! Na better luck, we no reach your level~"

She do am loud, dey roll eyes, as if na stage play. Some aunties begin dey whisper, dey tap each other.

Morayo just mutter for my ear, "She never see stress before, na why her mouth sharp."

I lock eyes with her, talk soft but strong: "Yes, she be my treasure. She no fit stand bad mouth, no dey like wahala. If anybody try make her vex for my front, I no care who you be or how close we be—I no go take am."

As I talk, I smile, carry the steel bottle opener for table, fling am go center table, my eye just dey move from my cousin wife to my cousin and others.

The opener jam porcelain plate and glass table, gbosa—the plate scatter. Everywhere just quiet.

My heart dey beat like talking drum. For that moment, na only my breath I fit hear.

E loud. Some people jump, some freeze. Even Grandpa grip chair, eye wide.

Maybe dem never see me vex before—my cousin wife look my face, she no gree at first, but she keep quiet finally.

Some of the younger cousins dey nod like say dem dey watch film. Respect enter room small.

But uncle no happy, he face my papa: "Old second, na so you train your pikin? Your brother and papa dey here, you dey allow am dey break things. Who him dey show? Na so disrespectful pikin dey behave? If you no fit train am, I go train am myself!"

He dey point finger, mouth dey shake. Some of the elders just dey cough, dey avoid wahala. Family drama don reach peak.

But when Auwalu dey slap table dey curse, you no talk. Now I throw opener, you wan show power?

My mind dey boil. Na so dem dey always support their own, but if na outsider, e go be wahala. Hypocrisy full everywhere.

You wan train me? No wahala, make we face am.

My voice come out low, but e cut like blade.

Before papa fit talk, I just cut in: "Uncle, na you dey do pass for family, na you dey show say you care. When Grandma sick, you no send. When she die, na her gold ring you first rush collect. Since then, you never drop one kobo for Grandpa hospital bill. Papa dey give Grandpa 80,000 naira every month, you dey chop 75,000. You no dey pay, and when Grandpa get fever, you no even cook for am. You nearly starve your papa die. You too dey show say you dey care, Uncle—who for here fit match you?"

As I talk am, my voice steady. Everybody quiet, na only AC dey hum. My mama dey wipe sweat for face. My sister dey bite finger.

Uncle face change to green immediately.

He open mouth, but no word come out. Even Grandpa pause, dey look me. Some of the uncles dey look ground, shame catch some.

Most family people no sabi all these things, dem begin whisper, dey look like say na film dem dey watch.

You fit hear "Ehn? So na true?" "I no believe!" for background. Wahala don enter another level.

"Enough! You this pikin!"

He shout, but e weak. The truth dey pain pass slap.

As the talk dey loud, Grandpa no fit hold am again.

He stand up, carry him walking stick, swing am give me, eye red: "Nonsense pikin! How you go talk to your uncle like that! Na your papa suppose dey give me money—I be him papa! I fit give my money to anybody I like. Who you be to question am? Just because you send me small money, you think say you fit disgrace your uncle for public? You no get fear!"

Grandpa voice shake the room. Him hand dey tremble, stick nearly fall from hand. Some people dey look away, others dey nod head, dey try cover family shame.

No wahala. Uncle na him pikin wey he love, me I just be the pikin wey my papa train. Na my family dey pay the money...

Na so family wahala dey—today, everybody go show true color.