Chapter 5: Annulment and New Shadows

Ten days pass, I receive palace annulment letter. Yellow cloth, red ink, official seal—our engagement don end for real. I open am with steady hand. The seal dey shine, the red ink dey thick, as if to say, "Na final be this." My chest dey light, but also dey heavy—relief and pain dey mix.

West wing don already clear. E empty, just like when I first come. The silence for the room get echo. No laughter, no footstep, only shadow. Na new beginning, but e pain.

I throw the letter anyhow for table, carry Ireti and thirty-six boxes of my dowry, waka commot for mansion. Boxes full for veranda, servants dey carry dem slow. Ireti dey count, dey direct people, everybody dey hush—nobody wan make noise. As we dey go, I no look back.

Dry season sun dey soft and warm. Sun dey bless my skin, no hot, no cold. Na sign say even in pain, world dey move. Days dey drag like harmattan—each morning, I dey learn how to breathe without pain.

Na that time, Tunde Garuba come back—make I talk true, na him and him people. Noise enter compound, soldiers dey follow. Neighbours peep from fence, children dey run follow horse.

That adviser, Ngozi, sit for front of him horse, her white agbada pure pass snow. I stand quiet, dey look as Tunde Garuba help Ngozi come down from horse with care. Tunde jump down quick, rush go her side. Him face dey soft, his hand dey gentle, like person wey dey hold gold.

"Ah..." Small cry—she fall straight enter Tunde Garuba hand. People gasp. Women for compound dey whisper. Dem two dey act as if na film dem dey shoot.

For front of mansion, people dey pass, dey look, dey gossip. The two no even send anybody. Market women dey talk, "Ah, see as general dey show adviser. Na so e dey be?"

He begin act, dey form say him dey suffer:

"I just find out say my adviser na woman. She don take care of me well. People fit talk anyhow, so I wan marry her as second wife."

E act am like say na big sacrifice, as if he dey pity the woman.

"Next month fifteenth, you and her go enter house together."

He voice dey loud, e want make all the compound hear.

"Prepare another wedding gown."

E point me, like say I no get choice.

I no talk, just dey calm like say nothing dey happen. I dey steady, my heart dey blank. No tear, no shout, I just dey observe like river wey dry.

Right for my front, Tunde Garuba hold Ngozi hand, dey give instruction one by one. "She no like too much shine-shine, so her jewel and cloth make e simple. She get injury, body no strong, no give her heavy work. Wedding arrangement, na you go handle."

He dey order me around like I be servant. Neighbours dey watch, dey gist. E dey pain me, but I no let am show.

The two dey smile. Happiness dey Tunde Garuba eye. His smile wide—teeth dey show. Na that kain shine wey man dey get when e sure say e win battle.

I nod, then suddenly smile. "I wish general and madam long and happy life together."

My smile sharp, my eye dey shine. Everybody notice say something dey hide for under my voice.

As I talk am, Tunde Garuba face change. He vex, "Wetin you mean with that your tone?" He dey expect say I go cry, but na cool fire I give am. E vex am well.

"If no be Ngozi wisdom, I for no fit take Garba Kingdom. As you dey enjoy for Makurdi, I dey risk my life for north, na Ngozi, wey no mind shame, save me."

Him voice dey rise, him chest dey puff. He dey use Ngozi as shield, dey explain like person wey dey guilty. He dey talk dey defend Ngozi. Him pride dey block him sense. Him dey forget say respect na two-way matter.

"She don already give herself to me. As man, I suppose give her proper name."

He dey talk as if honour dey for matter, but I know say e no reach that level. Him voice cold. Every word dey sharp like blade. He want make e pain me reach bone.

"Now, as I put her equal with you, I dey do her bad. You be noble lady—why you no fit just bear am small?"

E expect say my pride go keep me quiet. For our culture, woman dey learn to endure, but not every woman get that patience.

I breathe deep. My nail dig my palm, pain make my head clear. The pain dey ginger me. I no cry. Instead, I stand tall, chest dey move up and down.

So correct, so sure—he no let me talk. Plenty things choke for my throat. In the end, I just talk, "No wahala."

I talk am with finality. Na only God know wetin I dey swallow for inside.

Tunde Garuba nod, happy. He still dey talk, dey explain how secondary wife go behave, dowry, house matter, even the embroidery design wey Ngozi like—he talk everything. He dey break down plan as if na business. My body just dey cold, my ear dey block.

I no listen. I just dey nod, look down. Inside my mind, I dey pack my dignity, dey tie am for wrapper. I no go let tears disgrace me.

He finish. Ngozi face don red, she dey smile like person wey win lottery. Ngozi dey beam, her teeth dey show. Her eyes dey dance. Na big win for her, for real.

Finally, Tunde Garuba say, "You fit go back Aisha house for now, but no just dey idle. Plenty work dey for mansion—make sure say everything dey okay."

He still dey expect say I go run arrangement for Ngozi. E pain me, but I just nod.

I nod again. No word come out. I just carry myself with grace.

Before I go, I turn talk, "Oga, one letter from palace dey your study. Abeg, check am by yourself."

I dey use respect finish the matter. Make e know say I no dey fight, but I don waka.

Whether he hear or not, I no know. He too busy dey support Ngozi enter house—dey careful, dey pamper am.

As dem dey enter, neighbours dey count my boxes. People dey whisper, dey watch as woman dey waka out with pride, no tears.

For my back, servants and boxes just dey follow me like snake. If he look well, he for see say na me dey move out, no be just say I dey go house for small time.

If elders dey watch, dem go shake head, dey say, "This life, e fit turn any day." But for my heart, I swear, e no go ever turn back to the way e be before.