Chapter 5: Childhood Beef and Stubborn Love

The year I wake as succubus, my parents carry my brother Chuka go abroad for treatment.

I dey remember that year like say e be yesterday. Mama and Papa pack Chuka, carry am go Switzerland. Na only me dey house—lonely, no guide.

Nobody for me. Nobody teach me how to handle the pain.

The pain be like say scorpion dey crawl inside body. I dey beg spirit to come save me, but na only wall dey answer.

When I nearly die, na only that stubborn Obiora dey my side.

Obiora na real stubborn goat. Even when e dey vex, e go still show up. Na so e go buy fura and masa, sit down, dey eye me. E no dey talk, just dey present.

We don know each other since. At three, we throw mud; at ten, we burst each other bicycle tire; at eighteen, we spoil each other first love.

If you count beef for Lagos, na me and Obiora get Guinness record. Dem suppose give us award for stubbornness—no be small wahala.

Na so competition start—who get better result, who chop better stew, who run fastest for school race.

Na beef full ground.

Wahala na our second name. I dey remember as I steal e last chin-chin, na so e pour water for my bed.

At first, he no even want.

I chase am taya. Obiora no gree, e dey run like thief wey pursue dey catch.

“Ifeoma, if you no come down, I go kill you!”

Obiora go dey shout, e voice loud reach market woman. I just dey look am, dey laugh.

I wave pinky: “With this one?”

I do like say I go break e head, but na play. My pinky finger dey fly up, dey do nonsense.

Him face dark: “You don see another person own before?”

Obiora dey yarn, e face dey hard. I dey wonder whether na only me be mumu for this place.

I freeze.

Na true, I never see before. But I no go gree lose mouth. Street girl no dey fall hand.

No, but I no go admit am.

I dey form. "I dey craze? Na me first?"

I grab him belt. “So? You sef no fine reach. Touch you, you finish sharp sharp. Na your luck say I even try.”

I dey yarn as if say na me dey do favour. For my mind, na lie, but pride no dey allow me quiet.

Obiora vex, spit three 'good' back to back, then turn me over.

He use that "good" like pepper—sharp, painful. Next thing, he don turn table, wahala start.

“Ifeoma, you better dey run that mouth.”

E dey provoke me, but na love dey hide under all the gra gra.

He start to dey fight me.

Na physical and spiritual wrestling—bed shake, wall shake, even spirit dey watch.

Na joke—me na succubus. How human go win me for bed?

I dey feel say na superpower I get. Obiora be like ordinary guy, but e no dey tire.

But after one night, I learn lesson.

True, e shock me. I think say na play—Obiora show me pepper. I respect am from that day.

Obiora no be ordinary. Stamina no dey finish.

Guy no dey slow down. E be like athlete wey drink Tiger and Malt.

So, so, so, so perfect as cafeteria.

For my mind, I dey call am "all-you-can-eat buffet." E dey serve, e dey deliver. No slack.

I learn to dey bug am.

I develop new tactics—if you see my mind games, na only veteran fit survive.

No just roast him new moves, I dey give am low score on purpose.

If e try one new style, I go say, "Hmm, two star." Next thing, e go add ginger.

Every time, I dey get second round.

Na my own secret—low score mean bonus round. Smart girl.

But now, that trick no dey work again.

Obiora don wise. No be today dem born am. E dey wait for me, dey plan e own move.

Crazy Obiora na like iron cow.

Guy no dey tire. E dey come with full power. Sometimes, I dey fear say maybe I don charm myself.

My belle wan burst.

If dem ask, I go say, "Baba, I dey okay o, but e get as e be."

No be me be supporting babe for this story?

Why author put me for side? Why my wahala dey always pass main babe own?

Where main female lead? Why she never show?

Na question wey dey my mind every time. I dey reason say maybe na my own chapter author forget.