Chapter 4: Lagos Drama Escalate

She grab my hand, dey knock ground with the other one, just like those old women for village film wey dey cause wahala.

The ground dirty, but she no send. Her voice dey shake, you go think say she dey beg for market square.

She dey cry sotey her talk dey scatter: “My pikin, Mama no try for you... I dey stay next block, na recycling I dey do... That day, after I pick rubbish for your building, devil use me, I carry your battery go house. But some days later, as I dey charge am, e explode because the battery no good, injure my son and husband..."

The way she mention devil, e be like Nollywood scene. For my mind, I dey reason if na jazz or na real story.

E take me small time to understand wetin she dey talk. The woman dey find who she go use scam.

Her story bend anyhow. I dey look her leg, see if wound dey. I dey watch crowd, see if person dey record.

As she see my face, she wipe her tears, choke voice: “Mama no come make you suffer, just give me the receipt of your keke. Na the battery get wahala, abi? I go meet the company, I go... Mama know say na her fault, you sef na victim, why I go blame you?”

Her mouth dey sweet, but e dey sound rehearsed. My head dey hot. E be like say her eye sharp pass her age.

She just dey hammer “your battery,” e come dey worry me.

The way she repeat am, e be like say she wan use jazz for my head. I just dey nod like goat.

For one second, I wan gree, but I see one neighbour for crowd dey shake head for me.

The guy eyes dey red, e face serious, like person wey don see this kind scam before.

I calm down, think am well. Keke don go, but if I enter this matter, if she turn the story, na wahala for me. I just wave am: “Mama, you dey mistake me. I no get keke—I dey use okada go work.”

I show her my ride history, even open app, make everybody see. If you slack for Lagos, dem go use your hand bury you.

I show her the ride app for my phone.

The app still dey display ride details. She look am, look me, then sigh. Na so she pause, her drama slow small.

She just look me, mouth open: “You... you really...”

Her lips dey quiver, but e be like say the game don spoil for am. People dey look her, dey look me.

I no answer her, just waka go nearest okada, climb am, zoom commot.

My heart dey beat fast. The okada man sef dey look me for mirror. I just wave am make e move.

...

For road, I message my padi.

My guy dey always get street sense. I know say he go give me the real gist. Na him dey tell me as e be.

“You dey craze? You for give her receipt make she go meet company?”

He reply sharp sharp, voice note join. E dey laugh me join insult, “No let mumu do you o.”

“Better thank that person wey shake head for you. If you give her, dem for don bury you since.”

He add, "Guy, if na me, I go report am for community WhatsApp group make everybody know her face."

After my guy explain, fear catch me.

As I dey listen, I dey remember all the story wey I hear for compound about people wey their own hand do them. E fit be me next.

Turns out, the woman no innocent at all. The explosion na her own wahala, nothing concern the company.

If to say I gree, na so she go run me street. Na Naija, na who talk first police dey believe sometimes.

If she get the receipt, na to show say the battery na my own—nothing else.

E mean say na my name dem go call, even if I no dey near the scene. I just thank God say my sense wake up.

She wan use the receipt take put the blame for my head, sue me, collect money. Somebody must chop the blame, she wan make e be me.

Na Lagos we dey—person dey find scapegoat anyhow. Some people fit use you do sacrifice for small change.

Sometimes, na outsider dey see clear pass.

If to say nobody warn me, I for don enter wahala.

After my friend talk finish, my vex come back.

I dey squeeze my fist, dey wish say I fit confront her again. But I know say if wahala go start, na this Lagos people go still judge me.

See thief dey find who to use as scapegoat! Anybody wey sabi the matter go know say na she thief me, but for others, e go look like say na me kill her family.

For compound, mouth dey sharp, but eye no dey see pass face.