Chapter 1: The Abs, the Wedding, and the Whispered Names

When I was eighteen, I catch my own sister, Chisom, dey lift Obinna shirt, dey run her hand over him abs!

The memory still dey fresh for my mind, like yesterday. As I enter parlor that hot afternoon, na so I see Chisom dey gist with Obinna. The boy never even notice as she take raise him shirt. The way Chisom dey laugh, you go think say na play, but na serious something dey her eye. Na so I stand, dey wonder if na me dey craze or if na dem. My own sister, my own crush—wetin person go do for this life? For my mind, I just hiss, carry face, pretend say I no see anything, but my chest dey do me one kind.

The guy shirt loose, so she just do whatever she like.

Obinna dey shine teeth like goat wey thief yam—no shame at all. I gawk from behind the curtain, my heart dey pound. For our house, Chisom always get her way—if she wan something, she go collect am, no matter who dey there.

At twenty-two, Obinna listen to him family and marry me.

That marriage, e get as e be. No be because e love me, na just because elders talk say e good like that. E just dey sit for ceremony like person wey dem force chop bitterleaf soup. For our compound, people dey whisper, some dey look us with side-eye.

But everybody sabi—even after we marry, he still no fit let go of him burning love for my sister.

Even small pikin for our street sabi say Obinna no really dey my side. Any small thing, e go dey mention Chisom name, or dey look window like say e dey wait for her to appear from nowhere.

Later, I ask for divorce.

That decision no easy me at all. I lie down for bed many nights, dey reason am. But as I look the way things be, e clear say I no dey inside him heart. One night, after plenty tears, I just decide say I go talk am.

He keep quiet for long before finally signing the divorce papers.

Obinna just look me with him tired eye. The silence for that parlour fit break ground. Finally, he carry biro, sign am—no talk, no shout. Na that quietness pain me pass.

"If you ever need anything in the future, just let me know."

I no even answer am. For my mind, I dey wonder whether na true e talk or e just wan clear mind. But as I waka commot, I tell myself say I no go ever disturb am again.

At twenty-eight, I come back for Obinna and my sister wedding.

As I dey arrange my gele, dey ready for the wedding, na so my hand dey shake. I never believe say I go fit return for the same place, to watch two of them join together. The way my stomach turn ehn, na only God know wetin dey my mind that morning.

He give the man beside me a dark, deep look.

Obinna eye no dey calm at all as I waka enter reception. E glance the man wey dey follow me, one kain look wey fit break bottle. My body cold as I catch am. Chisom dey shine teeth for everybody, but Obinna eye dey on me.

Back then, he no fit wait to divorce me—turns out, everything na for her.

I just shake head. So na so the matter be. All those years, na Chisom dey his heart. As I sit down for wedding, I tell myself say na new life I go face, no turn back again.