Chapter 4: Bitter Truths and Birthday Blessings

The orange tree for west warm chamber still dey sweet me.

Anytime breeze blow the orange leaf, I dey remember old laughter, the hope wey we carry that time.

Na Tunde plant am when we marry, because I too like orange.

When I dey small, orange na treat for me. Even for market, if I see orange, my mouth go dey water. Tunde know, na why him finally agree.

At first, Tunde no wan plant orange, say make we do guava. Him talk say orange tree dey bring wahala.

Guava sweet, but orange na my heart. If man love you, he go compromise small.

I feel bad, turn back for am that night, face pillow.

No Naija woman dey ever gree quickly for wetin pain her. Silent treatment na weapon.

Him come dey carry orange enter bed one by one, dey make yeye sound: "Orange spirit greet Orange King, long live Orange King~"

The way he dey act ehn, I no fit hold laugh. Sometimes, small play dey mend heart pass serious talk.

I twist face, laugh with am.

I laugh reach my belle, the wahala for mind just fly.

Next morning, I see sapling for compound.

The thing dey shine for morning sun. I know say Tunde don surrender.

I ask am, surprise: "Na orange tree be that?"

Him answer with straight face: "No, na guava."

Everybody wey dey pass dey try hide laugh. Na only for Naija palace you go see king dey form innocence.

Servants just dey laugh for corner.

I touch the orange tree, leaf dey make soft sound.

As I touch am, my spirit dey cool. The tree dey represent our love—small but strong.

Morayo purse mouth. "Why e be like say na only love story I dey chop for here?"

She dey form hard girl, but her eye dey smile. Na so e dey be when story dey sweet.

I tilt head. "Ehn? Which food be dog food? E sweet?"

Sometimes, I go just use play take scatter her defense, make she relax join gist.

Morayo wave hand, laugh, run enter room. "Continue the story, I dey enjoy am."

Her laughter dey echo for corridor. Joy dey sweet pass meat pie.

The house still dey as e be before, but memory don dey old.

Even as new people waka come, the memory still dey shine, like old photo wey no fit fade.

Morayo pick small lion cap by bedside, curious. "Na for your pikin?"

Her voice soft, careful. She dey fear make she no touch pain.

My heart shake small. I smile soft, shake head. "Our pikin no reach this world. Doctor talk say my body too weak to born."

The pain na old one, but as I talk am, e still dey heavy for chest.

When I carry belle, I dey vomit till body tire. Smell of food dey make me wan throw up, I no fit chop, my mind weak. I just dey lie down dey sew this small cap.

Each stitch na prayer. If you never wait for child, you no go understand. Neighbours go dey ask, aunties go dey drop hint, but na only you know wetin dey your heart.

Anytime Tunde finish work, him go rush come. I dey sew, him dey do rocking horse. Him say make our pikin be hero come back.

He dey yarn hope, dey sing song, dey draw future wey we no fit see. Na so love dey give person small light.

But last last, I no fit keep the pikin.

Tears no dey finish. For Naija, people go say, "Ndo, e go better," but some pain dey permanent.

The day the pikin waka, Tunde hold my hand all night, dey kiss my forehead.

"No be your fault. Maybe e change mind, no wan be pampered pikin again, wan go waka as hero."

Him dey talk am make I no break. Na so Naija man dey package pain, dey cover own wound join.

As I still dey recover, princess consort arrange another woman for Tunde. Some small maids block am for bridal room, say make am do the do.

For palace, pikin matter big pass love. If you no born, pressure go land from every corner. I dey feel small, but I gats endure.

I curl alone for bed, cry all night. Cry sleep join.

Tears soak pillow, but na so life be. Sometimes you gats let pain flow.

Half sleep, na so person drag me enter him hand. Tunde even vex pass me, dey talk how e hard am to run come back.

Tunde na stubborn goat. E no dey gree for anything wey him no want. Na so I sabi say e love me real.

Truth be say, I happy inside, but I still talk say make am hear mama, try get pikin.

Sometimes, na duty dey chase person, not heart. I dey do my own sacrifice.

Tunde just dey do anyhow: "But me, I dey picky for bed and for person. Na sickness. E no go work with another person. If you no believe, try."

He dey talk with small pride, dey act as if na joke. I dey blush, but I like am.

He make me shy, I just hide inside cover, ignore am.

Shyness dey catch me. Naija woman dey form small even for husband.

He hold me through cover, dey pat me, dey talk small small:

"Plenty women full world, but na only Ngozi dey."

For his own way, e dey promise say I be him all and all. My heart dey soft.