Chapter 2: Breaking Illusions

Kabir was kneeling on the ground, but his spirit seemed far away. His face was blank, his eyes hollow—a completely different Kabir from the gentle, radiant one in my memories.

This was a side of him I’d never seen.

My finger had just lifted, but his emptiness froze me in place.

I looked at Arjun. He seemed startled by my sudden glance. His frustration and resentment flickered across his face, then faded, replaced by a brightness in his gaze that grew with every passing second.

I withdrew my hand, let out a shaky breath, and hurried to Appa’s side, whispering my decision in his ear.

Appa raised his brows, surprised, then nodded and addressed the two men: “You may withdraw for now.”

Those five words made Kabir’s eyes tremble ever so slightly. He looked up, met my gaze, confusion flickering in his eyes.

Arjun spoke: “Sir, what about the princess’s choice?”

Appa waved them off, hiding a secret smile beneath his moustache, the way elders do when they want to tease but must keep up appearances: “The official letter will be sent to the chosen one’s residence.”

In the air, the aunties’ commentary erupted:

“Eh? Why wasn’t it announced? Who did the little princess pick?”

“Since she didn’t choose, both are still possible. Look at Arjun—he’s grinning ear to ear.”

“Kabir obviously doesn’t want to be chosen, so why does he look so serious now that he wasn’t picked?”

“He’s probably figuring out how to make the little princess not pick him. He’s already met Meera, and the two have feelings for each other. If the princess gets in the way, what a pity.”

Get in the way?

I’d grown up with Kabir. How could I be the outsider now?

I dropped my head onto the table, the wood cool against my cheek.

All I could think of was Kabir: Kabir reading, Kabir practicing fencing, Kabir bringing me little bazaar trinkets that were only for me.

Even my brother used to tease that I was the only one Kabir truly cared about.

Desperate, I rushed to my brother’s quarters, begging him to help me sneak out and find Kabir.

It was dusk. My brother, finally relenting, gave me his access card and arranged for Suresh uncle, the driver, to take me out.

The gates creaked open, the peepal tree’s leaves whispering overhead. Suresh uncle gave me a knowing look but kept quiet, just as he did when sneaking me sweets after dinner.

The floating commentary followed me:

“The little princess is making a wasted trip. Kabir isn’t even home.”

“As soon as he left, he met Meera. The two went to the lakeside café to admire paintings. Right now, they’re all lovey-dovey and can’t bear to part.”

I clenched my teeth. I didn’t believe it.

Kabir doesn’t want to be my husband? He already has someone in his heart?

I needed to hear it from his own mouth.

But when I saw him at the lakeside café, my courage vanished. The café buzzed with college students and the clink of steel tumblers. Meera dabbed ink on Kabir’s nose, and something inside me snapped—like when Amma broke her favourite glass bangles. Kabir’s startled smile, his ears turning red, said everything.

Some truths need no words.

“Such a sweet couple.”

“Kabir is so much more relaxed with Meera than with the princess. He doesn’t have to worry about family pressure, and they’re equals in spirit.”

“Kabir didn’t resist being chosen because of family pressure. Poor guy can’t control his own marriage. No wonder he resents the princess.”

Kabir resents me?

It was summer, but my fingers felt cold as ice. I stood in silence, listening to the lake breeze and the distant temple bells, letting the ache settle in my chest.

Kabir noticed me. His smile vanished. He wiped the ink away and walked over, his kurta fluttering in the wind.

“Arre, Ananya, what a surprise,” he said, trying for casual.

“Who is she?”

Kabir pressed his lips together, shifting slightly to block my view. “Just a friend.”

His intention to protect her was obvious.

He looked at me as if I were some disaster waiting to happen, afraid I’d harm that young woman.

I didn’t realise I was such a villain in his eyes.

My heart felt pricked all over. I straightened my back and forced myself to sound normal: “Really? Then escort me home. I didn’t bring any attendants…”

“My painting!”

A worried female voice called from the café. The painting had blown into the lake. Meera leaned out to retrieve it.

Kabir’s face went pale. Forgetting all about me, he rushed back and pulled her into his arms.

In my memory, Kabir had almost never lost his composure. Watching him let out a long sigh of relief, Meera blushing in his arms, I saw the truth: their eyes only had space for each other.

Just as the words in the air had said: a loving couple.

The last bit of hope in my heart vanished at that scene.

I turned away.

“Ananya.”

Kabir called out once. I didn’t look back, nor did he call again.

I knew his choice, and I knew mine.

Those floating words were right. I’d always been pampered, always gotten what I wanted. There are plenty of good men in the world besides Kabir. Why humiliate myself?

But my chest felt tight, hard to bear. I thought it was mutual affection, but it was only my own wishful thinking.