Chapter 1: When Halima Moved On

Halima just break up with me like say nothing, and before I fit even recover, next thing I hear, Halima don do wedding with that small boy from our set.

As in, e pain me! That kind sharp, sharp break-up, I nor even see am coming. After all the years, the gist na say she just move on, marry that small boy from our set. My chest just dey heavy like trailer wey jam hold-up for Ojuelegba.

Now, I dey almost reach thirty, still dey waka from one blind date to another, dem dey bounce me left and right.

See ehn, every Sunday after church, my mama go dey call, dey recommend another 'wonderful man' she meet for fellowship. As if na so e dey easy. Sometimes, sef, my aunties go arrange one married man say make I just 'try talk'—abeg! The way dem dey look person, e be like say time dey catch fire for my head.

Five years later, class reunion land.

Fuji music dey boom from far corner speaker, the smell of small chops—puff-puff, samosa, even fried gizzard—just dey enter my nose, mix with the heat wey dey press body. Sweat dey gather for my back under the cheap plastic chair, but I just dey package face.

Dem show as correct middle-class couple—drive Benz, wear Canada Goose jacket, carry LV bag.

Everybody for the hall dey holla, "Correct couple!" as dem step in. All those Instagram filters nor even do pass as dem shine for real life. Some of our old classmates even dey snap selfie with them. Na real levels!

Me, wey ride okada come, just siddon for one corner quietly, dey look like I no belong.

I just dey balance for my plastic chair, dey pray make nobody notice my dust-stained slippers. My mind dey race: so na so life turn?

Until—

One aproko classmate come ask, “Morayo, why your husband no come?”

As the aproko reach my side, I just drop small smile. For my mind I dey think, 'Na so dem dey monitor my life? God abeg, make aproko rest small.' I know say her own wahala na to get gist carry go WhatsApp group.

I just smile reply, “He dey ring bell for Nasdaq.”

I fit see Halima mouth hang small, Tomi just blink. Me, I sip zobo like say I dey inside Forbes list.