Chapter 8: Hostel Gist and Jollof Gbege

Back, girls dey gossip.

Once I waka comot, na so talk start. Hostel group chat dey hot, people dey analyze move.

“She do am on purpose, wicked girl!”

Rumour spread—dem dey say I be witch, say my plan deep.

“She wan use trick get attention? Rubbish!”

Others dey talk say na clout I dey chase. Dem no sabi say na beef.

“Her papa get connection, na why she dey show herself!”

For Nigeria, once dem know your papa, wahala go follow. Everybody get mouth for your matter.

I wave, dey smile: “Yes o, I wan make am remember me.”

I no hide. I dey proud. My mind dey, my focus sharp.

Remember—no try me.

Make Yinka know say I dey, say wahala dey. If e wan sleep, make e reason my face.

After that, Yinka life turn film.

Everywhere he go, drama follow. For hostel, for class, for road—trouble just dey. People dey watch, dey bet for who go win.

For cafeteria, next table go ‘mistakenly’ pour jollof rice and stew, stain him white shirt red and yellow.

Stew stain him shirt, pepper aroma full hall, everybody dey laugh.

For library, person go ‘mistakenly’ flick ink, land for him forehead, drip down nose like old Nollywood film.

Even librarian dey shake head. Some dey say na village people. Others dey say na campus witch.

For sports day rehearsal, raw egg fly come from nowhere—gbam!—for back of him head, yolk stick for hair, dey shine for sun.

The whole field dey laugh. Boys dey shout, girls dey snap, even cleaner dey clap. E be like skit.

School dey buzz.

Everybody get opinion. Some dey say e too fine for all the bad luck.

“That transfer girl hire people dey worry Yinka!”

Rumour spread, my name dey trend for WhatsApp group.

“Dem say her papa na big man!”

For Nigeria, connection dey count. Everybody dey try link the matter.

“Yinka too get bad luck… but still fine…”

E be like say the more wahala, the more him fine dey increase. Girls dey reason am for night.

But Yinka shock everybody.

He drop statement for confession wall: That girl na confirmed wahala, e show for face.